I think it’s much easier to pretend to be a different person online - that is, if one cares about how one comes off to total strangers one is unlikely to ever meet in person.
In fact, interacting online seems to give a lot of people license to act out their absolute worst side - in a way that I don’t think most would talk to each other if they were face to face… at least I would hope so.
And while I’ve witnessed beautiful moments of kindness, there also seem to be a LOT of Very Angry Folks who use their time online to work out whatever demons they struggle with. I can’t know nor would I ever assume that they sustain similar levels of outrage offline, as that seems both psychologically and physically unhealthy in the long term.
I admin a few groups here and there & keep a pretty tight ship, so personal attacks or anything that veers into the political realm get shut down pronto, but it’s disheartening to see the level of pugnacity with which (possibly) decent, rational people engage.
Certainly, the level of passive-aggressiveness the online world facilitates is unsurpassed.
Which is why I try to focus on those who can muster a modicum of respectful discourse, regardless of subject matter or different view points. No need to up my BP meds at this point, tank you berry much.
PS: Face to face also doesn’t allow for spewing paragraph after paragraph of angry rants, then slapping a smile emoji on it to imply friendliness or ‘j/k.’ But that’s just more of that PA shit I can’t stomach.
I was an admin on a site once, and the few affirmatively bad apples made it hell for the rest of us - admins and members both. I have always had a rule that I’d never post anything online that I wouldn’t attach my real identity to, but from what I experienced, a lot of folks don’t share that way of doing things.
See, the thing with my groups is… you’re out after ONE personal attack… unless it’s not terribly egregious, then just a warning. But the second offense is a strike-out.
I learned early in life that Mark Twain was right . . . to be a good liar you have to have a good memory. My memory’s not so good, so I tend to just be me. I have, however, come across more than a few folks on line who live a very full fantasy life. If it makes them feel better, who am I to judge?
IRL I really have no choice. I’m told I have the world’s worst poker face.
On the other hand, I got a current iPhone SE 3
for $49 at wallyworld so there are bargains to be had.
3 Likes
CCE
(Keyrock the unfrozen caveman lawyer; your world frightens & confuses me)
683
My daughter adopted a pup yesterday. He’s about 6 mos old, some retriever mixed breed the shelter thinks, but I also think there’s some bull terrier in there - his face is wider than his waist, or whatever the part of a dog’s back is just ahead of his hips is called. I think he’s going to start putting on weight and maybe more height yet pretty quickly. He’s already a bit taller and longer than my old lab/springer mix we got from HS.
She and her younger sister first saw him Saturday at the shelter, but he was a new accession and hadn’t been neutered yet and wasn’t officially up for adoption. She already had planned a day off work yesterday (stacked up all her annual med appointments). Although he wasn’t listed on the shelter’s website yet, we took a chance and ran down between her appointments, and they were happy to have her adopt.
He’s sweet but really weird in one particular. He fears any transition. Doorway? Got to carry him through. Stairs? Scared scared scared, doesn’t even want to try. Elevator? Carry him on, and then back off again. Have to pick him up to get him into the car’s back seat and then pick him up to get him out.
I’m trying to figure out what could have caused him to be so afraid of doorways and stairs and what not.
Meanwhile, after several tries this morning she’s gotten him to where, if she drags him down half a flight of stairs, he’ll walk beside her the rest of the way down. But then to exit the stairs, he’s still scared of going through the doorway. She took 1/2 day off work this morning and I told her to keep going down the stairs every half hour to see if he gets used to it, and to also reverse herself mid-flight and see if he’ll go up the stairs starting from mid-flight (to take that initial step out of the equation).
So she’d had him down the stairs several times and out for walks, when she called me about an hour ago to say it might be working. Then had to cut the call short because despite being out for a walk just minutes before, he decided to pee on the floor…
But maybe she lurks. 
