Images courtesy of a newly discovered Fb group called “Your childhood ruined.”
It’s a treasure trove of foul language and bad taste <3
My favorite!
I posted the more, uh, family-friendly images.
https://www.facebook.com/YourChildhoodRuined/photos/?ref=page_internal
Made me think of this.
I could post 5 a day and still be busy for a month 
Don’t tempt me…
Taps foot impatiently. Your move.
Well this is embarrasing. Did have a magical evening. An epic gaming session with cdc in Diablo three. Almost felt sorry for the mobs. Almost.
I’m not interested in manicures. Especially the ones with shiny unicorns like Respectfully favors but when life allows me to go into Treat YoSself mode it sure is fine.
https://youtu.be/gSjM5B3QNlw
Awww you cheat. So unfair. Oh okay you win. This time. I cannot prevail vs such cuteness.
Curtseys gracefully to the kitteh who is obviously wearing the oven mittens on it’s back paws.
Cannot believe you would stoop to a Massive cuteness attack. Bah.
Lolol I was desperate. It was my only defense.
Dam you. It worked well. Now you know my weakness. Unfortunately the way my mind works is that now I am thinking of other ways you may be using those amazing mittens.
I know now that they will never be mine alas but this sad situation has fired my imagination.
Besides kitten back paw protectors maybe you have ferengi ears which are magnificent.
But if your area is anything like mine you might get stared at too much out in public. Not sure if this would work but you might be using the mittens to go incognito. And really I just like typing the word incognito.
As noted by the Star Trek Database, bigger ears are seen as a mark of virility, which makes sense given that they’re also erogenous zones
Here is why I wanted those forever unattainable mittens.
I have a fairly large stuffed gnome on the back of my sofa right next to me and he reads everything I type, everything I read.
Trust me he keeps me out of trouble.
When I sleep I leave my big desktop computer on for him. I have had to block him from amazon for obvious reasons.
If I post something really strange here the gnome did it.
But all that typing has caused wear and tear to his mittens so that is why I wanted them so badly.
He looks kinda like this:
Have you looked for mittens at your local Gnome Depot?
Oooo. I like the way you think! Thanks. You are starting to remind me of someone I like on another sandbox.
I read one of his very first posts there talking about his degree in mathematics .He was not specific and I replied by asking him if he was in actuarial science and he told me to read his post.
How could I not fall instantly in love? It was a misunderstanding of course but I really try to read a post carefully before I respond.
Later I complimented him and he told me he hoped he asked nicely for me to read his post. Naw. Asking nicely would have ruined it for me.
Now we argue about whether he is a gamer or not. But I could smell that gamer stench on him and he finally admitted to playing mtg for a little while. I knew it!
He plays bloon tower defense sometimes too.
I was talking about getting a bad review on squirrel yelp and he told me it was a shame that foursquirrel was down.
Oh and his amazing wife has a gnome obsession. Off to gnome depot because getting the gnome puppy dog eyes can do real harm to my already damaged psyche.
Mike Huckabee who has been hawking some type of relaxing/sleeping pill has now dragged his wife into it.
And of course Prevagen is the main sponsor for Jeopardy and WOF.
I give up.
My eyes are scalded from his owning a Rickenbacker bass.
That should be illegal 
