A belated report of the good, the bad, and the ugly 
TLDR up top, long and painful elaboration later. Not our finest Thanksgiving.
APPS:
- Baked brie: AWFUL. Thwarted by arrival delays.
- Smoked salmon platter, cheese board - usual for this meal and this group (I didnât like the salmon at all which was TJs 1-pound wild salmon pack)
MAIN EVENT:
- Turkey: AWFUL. Didnât get properly cooked, then all attempts to fix that ruined it further.
- Stuffing Balls: FANTASTIC, crunchy all over, fluffy inside, but SALTY.
- White gravy: This is usually my favorite thing on the plate, but it didnât taste like itself. I think she forgot or significantly under-used the Herbes de Provence that goes into it.
- (Brown) Gravy: Fine, but also not the usual flavor bomb (my aunt makes amazing gravy), and not enough for leftovers.
- Mashed potatoes: Under-seasoned, which was perfect in light of the salty stuffing.
- Other Vegetables: Green beans were fine, roasted acorn squash was new to the mix and mostly went uneaten, Brussels sprouts dried out in the air fryer (not enough oil)
- Cranberry sauce: Homemade by one of her kids, and eaten out of a dedicated bowl by one of the grandkids, lol)
DESSERT:
- Pecan pieS: One from a fancy place, one from TJs. I think a whole one went into the freezer.
- Apple pie: Also store-bought. I ate a bit of crust with ice cream.
- Peach crumble: From frozen peaches and homemade crumble mix.
- Ice cream: To go with everything (or, if you were one of the grandkids, the main event)
- I kept my brownies and orange olive oil cake for hostess gifts as they were unnecessary given the options (also, I didnât want the grandkids eating brownies and ice cream vs the crumble grandma made)
Post-game analysis:
BRIE EN CROUTE:
The only app I was âallowedâ to make. Coated in hot pepper jelly, then wrapped in puff pastry. Usually fabulous.
But the two big eating families were 1-2 hours later than expected without explanation, so the brie that had been baked to be ready 30 mins after they arrived ended up sitting in the oven to stay warm, which did not turn out well. The worst baked brie I have ever cooked or eaten - rind became leathery, inside turned to melted fat. Still, half was eaten.
STUFFING BALLS:
This was my âinnovationâ a few years ago, for more crunchy bits. Aunt suggested I add chicken breakfast sausage this year, which I did without much thought, because who doesnât like sausage? No one in this family anyway! BUT⌠the sausage is salty, the stuffing mix is salty (as expected), and the butter we had was also salty.
So, it was a salt lick. And yet: delicious, all gone between the meal and leftovers packed up by everyone (I had to lobby for a double batch so there would actually be leftovers). And lots of comments about how much we all love stuffing balls.
Next year: no sausage, unsalted butter. Either that or a loaf of plain/unseasoned stuffing bread mixed in.
TURKEY:
My last real thanksgiving (pre-pandemic), I convinced my aunt to do the Judy bird (salted in advance, cooked at a very low temp for longer). She declared it âthe best turkey ever madeâ and also proclaimed âthis is the way weâre going to do it from now on.â
Well, the three years between then and now apparently wiped her memory, and she instead employed a bizarre hybrid of her previous methods (butter under skin, high temp start plus mid-temp rest of the way).
There were two smaller turkeys (because thatâs all WF had) crammed together in the new All Clad pan she really wanted to use. I strongly suggested, several times, that we use another roasting pan and separate the turkeys, but for some reason she dug in her heels and did not want to do this, even though there was plenty of space in the oven for two roasting pans.
So. Dark parts didnât cook. Light parts partially cooked. Turkeys had to be hacked while hot to put the uncooked parts back. This was a whole other thing. She kept refusing verbal help and suggestions from her kids (to maneuver the bird out of the hot pan, or on the carving boards). I finally rolled up my sleeves (literally), went around to her side of the island and put my hands where she needed them: lifted one bird off the board so juices could be poured off, got out kitchen shears to help her separate the legs and thighs, picked up the other bird with my hands so she could swap them, and so on â while her kids watched, bemused. âSHEâS ROLLED UP HER SLEEVES! HERE WE GO!â Yup, better than standing around watching your mom, who is already appalled and embarrassed, have to struggle through this while the rest of you yell out at her without actually doing anything 
Dark parts were put back in at a higher temp, and then inedible to me when they were âdoneâ (I am a dark meat eater, and this annoyed me enough that I ate only white meat, which was also in short supply because the breast was also somewhat underdone on one side - my last assist of the day was to suggest everything go in to the PC for a short cook, when the meat could be removed and the carcass go back in as it usually would for soup â to save more oven overcooking).
Next year: Start lobbying for the Judy bird in September to slow-play the convincing.
