How (if at all) do you expect a restaurant to ‘honor’ a special occasion?

I am one of those pesky folks who check the box on Opentable or Resy to inform a restaurant of a birthday, anniversary, or other celebratory occasion upon making a reservation.

I have had all kinds of experiences, ranging from a glass of bubbly on the house at the beginning of a meal (anniversaries), a candle on a house-baked cookie or personalized dessert plate (birthdays), and I will admit to expecting… well, something. Otherwise, why even bother asking your guests if you’re going to ignore it?

For my birthday dinner at a pricy, hip pasta place last week I was presented with a printed “Happy Birthday” note. I suppose it’s the gesture that counts, but I thought it was rather silly compared to examples I gave above. Perhaps I would have deemed it at least ‘cute’ — if the meal itself hadn’t been such an expensive disappointment.

Do you mention your special occasion when reserving a table? What are your expectations and experiences?

Of course, I could see the other end of the equation, where businesses might be weary of handing out free glasses of bubbly to people who may just be faking it to get a freebie, so I’m curious to hear from the industry folks among us, too.

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I also check the box for birthday or anniversary or what have you. It was H’s birthday this week, and the only acknowledgment of the occasion by the restaurant was the host saying “happy birthday” before she seated us. So that was…not great. A much better example: a glass of champagne for each of us and “happy anniversary” written in chocolate on our dessert plate at Gage and Tollner.

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We wouldnt normally mention a special occasion. For some reason we did for my birthday this year. Place was a pub with rooms (and Michelin starred restaurant), where we were staying overnight. There was a birthday card in the room. I’m fine with that, as we had zero expectations.

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I don’t expect freebies in this economy.

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I don’t expect freebies in any economy, but at least stick a sparkler in my dessert or something.

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Life’s all about expectations, doncha know? :wink:

I’m also not sure if this ‘occasion’ box is more of a function of the rezzie sites, and whether restaurants would rather do away with it entirely.

That said, those who have gone above & beyond are fondly remembered (and recommended) — 'tis the hospitality biz after all.

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ETA: Coulda sworn I indicated our anni celebration at the fancy Thai Temple of Fine Dining last night, and there was zero acknowledgement of it, either.

Not the only reason we won’t be back, but … yeah, just kinda shabby IMO.

rarely. but this was a nice touch - (sigh) regrets the place did not survive covid . . .

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That’s exactly what I’m talking about! It really doesn’t take a lot of time, effort, or resources to make a meal just a little bit more memorable. QED.

Just went for my (belated) birthday to a nice steakhouse here in New Orleans. I think I checked the box on OpenTable but the waiter also asked us if we were celebrating anything, so I said yes. They serve an individual meatball as an amuse-bouche at this place and mine came like this:

We also go to a particular restaurant that has superlative service for our anniversary every year, and they really do a nice job with it. A custom-printed menu with “Happy Anniversary Mr. & Mrs. travelmad478”, a sprinkle of glitter stars on the table, glasses of champagne, etc. Which is why we go every year!

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And you perhaps wouldn’t if it weren’t for the extra niceties.

Also, I LURV that bday meatball :heart_eyes_cat:

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We might anyway, because this place has by far the best service of any restaurant in town even without the celebration flair, plus great food, but I will say that their extra touches really seal the deal.

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I had a big bash planned for our 50th anniversary - rafts of friends, etc . .
even had a bakery lined up to ‘reproduce’ our wedding cake (from pix…) . . .

covid did the whole thing in . . .

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We had to postpone a double/round birthday & anni celebration due to Covid as well.

Had a massive bash in '22 instead. Aufgeschoben ist nicht aufgehoben :wink:

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well, unfortunately the resto - which was widely known as ‘le best’ to be had in the area … did not survive covid. and the enthusiasm passed as DW retired from work and ‘friends group’ before any re-stage could be managed.

but… we’re working on 55 now, and every bit as (oh dear, fill in the blank, use your imagination, , , we will not disappoint . . .) as year one…

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Wink wink nudge nudge. Say no more.

As someone above noted, the question about special occasions might be a function of the third-party reservation system, just as the requests for tips on terminals in fast food places is a function of the company providing generic software.

And ultimately this apparently will annoy the restaurant’s customers, making its use of the reservation service problematic at best

'twas I who mentioned it. It’s clearly not a choice made on the side of the restaurants.

Back when we were dating, my husband took me out to dinner at a very nice restaurant in Dallas for my birthday. Everything was going along just fine until the end of the meal. Our waiter came marching out proudly bearing a birthday cake, candles blazing, singing Happy Birthday to you. Everyone in the place had to join in on that joyous occasion, clapping at the end. I was thoroughly embarrassed by it all, but didn’t show my true feelings.in public. He never made that mistake again. Ever. :slightly_smiling_face:

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There seems to be two types regarding restaurants and b-day celebrations: those into it and those who are not. Neither is right or wrong…simply personal preference on how you do your birthday. I’m in the don’t make a big deal out of it, definitely no candles and singing. A cupcake and a candle for dessert and leave it at that is okay. Nothing said is okay too. Of course sometimes it’s “not about you” (when it really is), or people not knowing. It’s always interesting to find out people’s preferences and why…because it seems to vary greatly for many reasons.

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