Thoughts? I only “have to” feed myself and my PIC, and I still enjoy figuring out what we might like on any given day for the most part, but there are def stretches where I, too, feel overwhelmed by the many options out there, or just draw a blank. This site, of course, has been and continues to be incredibly helpful when inspiration or mojo fails 
2 Likes
I don’t know how my mother did it for so many years, although she kind of had a system: “dairy” (quiche, lasagna, etc.) on Mondays, meat on Tuesday & Wednesdays, fish on Thursdays (her supermarket shopping day), and chicken on Fridays (for Shabbat). Saturdays were usually leftovers; Sunday was out to eat or the meal that takes a long time to make.
My father and I used to guess what we were going to have for dinner, based on what my mother was thawing out or what dish she hadn’t made in a while. We were right a surprising amount of the time.
2 Likes
Some people live to eat, some people eat to live
1 Like
That’s a little black & white, don’t you think? If you read the article, that family certainly likes to eat. It’s just the main cook who got tired of doing all the work, all the time 
1 Like
I know but I found the author very whiny about how hard it is to cook and plan…
1 Like
I kind of did as well. Why not involve others in the making of various dinners? The kids certainly could have helped created a potato topping bar or pizzas when they were tweens to teenagers. She took it on herself to feed everyone early on, but to the best of our knowledge, she never asked how the rest of the family felt about her NOT cooking every night. To the best of our knowledge, she never asked her spouse could have kicked in at times. It wasn’t until she finally got sick of it and told her family that they’re on their own (and they were happy about i) that she realized this. So it’s kind of on her.
I mean, I’m very glad I don’t have to prepare a dinner every night. If I’m driving home from work and haven’t pulled anything out to defrost or have something ready to go (either in the fridge or in my brain as an idea), I can make scrambled eggs or cereal, cheese and crackers, or a handful of nuts and Fritos (not together though!) without having to worry about kids or others to feed. But when I do cook? I enjoy thinking about what’s in my fridge/freezer/pantry and preparing the ingredients.
3 Likes
“Now I make simple meals a few times a week, and on other nights we rely on takeout and cereal.Now I make simple meals a few times a week, and on other nights we rely on takeout and cereal.”
Yup, that’s the easy route, but I doubt it’s providing a lot of benefit to keeping bodies running well.
Dinner is often a pain in the arse, especially when you’re dealing with intolerances or aversions. Sometimes (and, sometimes often) you have to grit your teeth and deal with it like a grownup who knows they have responsibilities and obligations, especially when there are kids involved.
“Erin O. White is the author of the forthcoming novel “Like Family.”
Or she could just be trying to draw attention to her new book. Publication date. November 4, 2025. Who knows.
2 Likes
I definitely understand the dinner fatigue. Working full time with a kid, dinner definitely gets to feel like an obligation, as the author mentions. One problem for me is that cooking/baking is one of my hobbies and a creative outlet, and one of those activities that I can get into a “flow state” with - and it can help me to destress when I’m in that zone - but often this hobby begins to feel like an obligation and drudgery. (Maybe I need some new hobbies!)
Right around the end of the school year last year, I was absolutely burnt out from cooking and the reason I most looked forward to our long summer vacation was that I wouldn’t have to cook for almost two weeks! I came back refreshed and back in the groove, but with the luxury of time that I now do not have back in the swing of the school year.
But I have made a couple of changes that have eased the pressure a bit. First, I enlisted my husband’s help to cook one work night a week (there’s a thread on the cooking board about it). This has been a huge help. He doubles the recipes so we usually have enough for a dinner or two plus maybe some leftovers for smaller lunch portions, and enough to feed the freezer a bit. If there’s a night I know is going to be crazy, I can defrost something and we don’t need to spend a lot of money on takeout that is inevitably much less healthy than whatever is in the freezer. Second, I got my butt back to the farmers’ market. (It’s a long winter in NY but from May to October the farmers’ market is bountiful.) That did wonders for my cooking mojo. Simple preparations work well with the incredible raw ingredients I can get from our award-winning local market. Yes, it is pricey, but the freshness and taste is incomparable and much more satisfying than grocery store ingredients. In addition, the human connection piece of talking to people, often the very people growing/raising the food I’m buying, and being among my community, has energized me too. I know it’s a privilege I am able to shop there and not one I take for granted. Finally, and I think the author alludes to this, I have just tried to put a little less pressure on myself about dinner. I do like for us to sit down together, and my daughter is still young and unencumbered enough for it to happen daily. But I’ve been trying to simplify with easy preparations, some shortcuts/convenience items, and not stressing too much about it all, and everyone is still happy and fed. I still do love a good cooking project or diving into an elaborate recipe, but I’m saving that for weekends or vacations for now.
3 Likes
