Yeah, I seem to recall a guest, who was not at all a good cook, doing that to me. What ya gonna do, except take another sip of wine - and think, but not utter, the (in)appropriate riposte? I always check beforehand for allergies, religious preferences, and dislikes. I behave myself at someone else’s table. That’s what my mom taught me to do… and she was right.
As for handing out recipes, which the recipient proceeds to alter beyond recognition- just look at the comments on the recipes in The NY Times. It’s like watching a car wreck.
40 years ago, friends came to my place for dinner. One of them was insistent: he was going to prepare cream of mushroom soup - with mushrooms and Coffee Mate. I’m struggling to suppress my gag reflex even now.
I agree completely……with one exception: You are served a very nice meal, no complaints, and you’ve had your fill. The hostess asks you to take more, and you thank her and explain that you can’t manage more. In response she puts more into your plate. I’ve had that done to me many times. I don’t eat what’s in the plate because I can’t.
If you can’t, you can’t. I’m not a Mom at the table: I never put seconds on someone’s plate unless they request it or assent whey I offer it. I’m not the Finish Your Vegetables Or You Don’t Get Dessert Cop.
The Jewish Mother’s admonition: “The name of this ship is the S.S. Mein Kind (the ess! Ess! — eat! Eat! My Child! — for those among us unfamiliar with Yiddish … or German)
(Keyrock the unfrozen caveman lawyer; your world frightens & confuses me)
Don’t think I’ve ever done this, nor had anyone do it to me.
My sister has done it to her husband when they were eating my chili, though. He’s a lover of super spicy foods and his chili is just habanero all the way (back then - now he will add some of the more exotic spicier stuff as well).
She remarked that mine was nice and spicy but had a lot of layers to the flavor and asked how I did it so I explained about the 7 or 8 types of chilis, whereupon she skewered his as “mono-dimensional, you should make it like this”.
He just grinned and said (to her), “But this isn’t spicy enough” then to me, “Keyrock, do you still have that habanero sauce you made?”. But he was just joking and poking a bit of fun back at her, mainly.
This kind of conversation is 80 percent of the conversation at the chow meets / cookie swaps, potlucks, gelato tastings, chocolate tastings, Cake Days, Pie Days I used to attend with former Chowhounds from Toronto. Compare and contrast, this isn’t a as good as what I had in Paris/ Tokyo ad nauseam