Invited to a dinner party . What do you bring ?

It’s hardly just American. I was taught to bring hostess gifts by my Belgian mother.

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I don’t think too many Britons have adopted Belgian culture. Not even those of us who have often visited the country.

I agree with bringing a bottle or two. If you’re concerned about upsetting the host’s wine pairing, consider cocktails, or an after meal aperitif, fine port, sherry, or cognac.

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I am not the sort to bring a gift for dinner parties, nor do I expect one. Not how I was raised. To be fair, they may have been wolves. That being said, we invited a friend to pizza (delivery) a few weeks ago and he brought a bottle scotch as a host gift. It was deeply appreciated. So, I would say go in a host gift direction if you feel you must bring something… If not wine, then something they can enjoy at their leisure later.

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I wouldn’t bring a dish unless specifically asked, or if it’s a potluck event.
A small hostess gift, meant as a “thank you for the hospitality” would be appropriate. What is the level of formality of this event?
A small box of good chocolate or candies would be nice. My local Rite Aid has Lindt and Whitman’s samplers LOL but if you are near a TJMaxx or Home Goods they usually have a nice selection. Macy’s carries Godiva as do some grocery stores.

ouch

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Graag Gedaan. :grinning:

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Agree with the posters that said low key. Don’t bring any food that they would feel they have to incorporate into a meal they’ve already planned. This goes for bread and desserts and wine. I like the idea of chocolates or marzipans or some tasteful little box of candy that they can bring out later. A jam, a mustard, flowers already in a vase or a little seasonal plant in a pot are also nice thoughts. However…

What you said about - doesn’t matter what they want - it’s what I want - is very much a golden rule vs platinum rule situation. Why impose on other people if they’ve told you what they want?

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I dont think so. They brought something when we were all hosted by Dutch, Lebanese, Ukrainian, Canadian, and French hosts, too.

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If you have no time to make a dish, bring excellent bread and butter, or very good chocolates.

When I’ve brought a dish to a party , it’s often been Martha’s Perfect Mac & Cheese, or an arugula and peach/mango/pear salad that I dress when I get there.

I always bring something when visiting a friend’s home, whether it’s dinner or just an informal get together (like just coffee or whatever).

If it’s dinner, I don’t bring anything edible or drinkable. Sometimes, it will be a small thing like a picture frame, or a coffee table book, just something to show my appreciation. If it’s a small get together (like for coffee or something), I might bring some fresh fruit (for the host to enjoy later) or small houseplant (assuming they have a green thumb).

But I try never to show up empty handed. It’s just how I was raised. Not saying this is right or wrong, or better or worse, or whatever. Just stating a fact, and not a normative statement.

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Unless you are sure that your host celebrates Christmas you should not gift them Christmas themed items.

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Counterpoint, I dislike clutter. I wouldn’t want any of the gifts you mentioned. Receiving them would burden me with having to regift or donate them then come up with a story about why I’m not displaying them when you visit in the future.

Why do people refuse to honor hosts’ simple request to not bring anything?

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I love chocolate, but I dislike all the brands you mentioned except for Lindt.

This is why I ask people to not bring anything when they visit. Almost every time I regift, donate or throw away their gift. This is extra work for me and often a waste of the item.

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This is highly Societal. I grew up (al long time ago) in the Southern US, and my mother would never have arrived without some kind of gift. When we are in France, our (mostly British) friends usually bring a bottle of wine,our French friends not so much. I would not presume to bring a food item to eat the night of the dinner,and would not expect my host or hostess to serve a wine I brought with the meal. Likewise, I would considr it presumtuous

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My suggestions were based on the OP’s lack of shopping options. A small gesture such as this should not be a burden on the host.

The host has asked the original poster to not bring anything. This indicates that they would consider a gift to be a burden.

(Sorry, I got cut off) to bring a decorator item. I think candy is always good, and does not create the “vase problem” like flowers.
To deal with this problem, a group of friends created a phony wine label, pasted it on some really cheap wine, and pass the bottles back and forth. Solution in hand: You get to bring something, they get a bottle to use when they come to see you next. Win-win.

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Aside from small children, I cannot ever think of anyone on any occasion ever asking for a gift.

So I think for most people, when they hear “oh, please don’t bring anything” it’s simply a perfunctory response to be polite, like saying “good morning” when you see someone in the morning, when in fact most people could give a flying fcuk how your morning is going, be it good, bad or somewhere in between.

But, as always, you do you.

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I saw a creative idea somewhere online. Wrapping a book in a kitchen towel. Not a very expensive gift either! Like this:
image

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