I’ve felt a rant coming on the past few days, but bear with me, I’m not even going to whine. (I hope)
I’ve decided during this pandemic, there seems to be two types of people emerging - what I call Covid Careful or Covid Casual. Unfortunately we seem to to know more Covid Casuals, with the exception of DD2 and SIL. I realize I’m more paranoid than most, but I’m still taken aback when my friends try to hug me or get too close. Why go there, even? So, basically I’m isolating, although I really need the stimulation of interaction, which isn’t safe for me.
So, just wondering if any of you have experienced the same? BTW, our friends are mask wearers and hand washers, but become too cavalier during our extremely rare social outings. Oh, and then there’s my dad who thinks he’s absolutely bulletproof with a mask and hand washing. But of course I have no control over that, as well, he lives out of state.
The only people I’ve socialized with have the same Careful level as I do. So we talk while 6 feet apart, and no one tries to hug anyone. I don’t like huggers anyway, so I’m already good at backing away if someone lunges at me.
I come from a family of hand washers and non-huggers, so that’s not too difficult. Sisters have become more huggy with 25-30 years of marriage into huggy families, but nobody takes offense, not even the nieces, nephews and greats. And mom and dad instilled hand washing into our daily routine and I’m sure my sisters have done the same with their families.
That said, since March I have had only two visits. BIL 2 came over (masked) to fix a faucet. Sis 1 and her husband did actually come over for a visit\lunch and stayed for a few unmasked hours. My 91-y-o mom lives with me–she’s gone to the dentist and doctor, but I can no longer accompany her to interpret their instructions–and I try to keep her in bubble wrap.
We talk on the phone (!) much more than we did before March.
The house next door sold just as the shutdown took place. I’ve “met” my new neighbors from a 6-foot distance. They have 2 or 3 kids? Their names are Kevin or Devon? Patty or Mattie? 6 feet and masks make it pretty hard to make out. Maybe next spring we’ll figure it out.
@Lambchop I can’t remember when anyone but mom talked on the phone. Now we’re all chatty–texts don’t cut it; we need to speak and hear and communicate.
Yes, I was strictly a texter before Covid, except for catch up calls with relatives, and regular convos with dad. Agree that hearing those near and dear is most especially needed at present @gaffk.
I am Covid Very Careful and so are my closest friends – so we haven’t seen each other for months. I have a couple of casual summer friends who are far more Covid Casual whom I have seen twice at a masked 10 feet outside, saying I’m not comfortable with anything else, and who nonetheless keep inviting me out to restaurants. I guess it’s nice they like my company? But it’s not happening.
@shrinkrap, some of my family in Alaska are a little, shall we say “fringey”. Sis in law, whom I adore, started to go off a little about Covid being overblown - I had to shut her down somewhat by saying that nurses and docs breaking down, ICU’s being full, and refrigerated morgue trucks were not in fact “lying”. Although I do realize that numbers can be skewed, and media sensationalizes. It’s become an interesting (distracting?) divide.
@GretchenS, I’m very lucky that H does the shopping, but I do run the occasional quick errand. I usually double mask, and make it in and out of wherever, in about 10 minutes flat. Definitely not comfortable inside buildings at this point. A big no to eating inside a resto. And yes, masked, with about 10 feet of distance is my comfort zone.
I live alone and tick all the high-risk boxe. I am Covigilant in the extreme. Much of what experts initially equivocated about but now advise, I expected from the start, acting accordingly. I have quarantined since March 2. Contactless delivery is as close as I have come to another human. My friends aren’t Coblivious, but they have become lax due to impatience, and I worry about their safety.
I read a FB post today that I agree with. The gist is that any social interaction should default to the concerns of the most cautious, and that plans shouldn’t be changed last minute. E.g., if you invite friends for a party in the driveway, where guests can control their distance, don’t move it to the deck, which limits separation, without notifying everyone beforehand. And don’t hold it against anyone who cancels because of the change.
I’m careful and in my line of work, it’s challenging all the time. Crews are not only used to close proximity but sweating, sharing grub and sleeping in all sorts of scenarios. We have had to adjust and readjust. We have had to break up crews and layoff people based solely on their more casual behavior off duty. With family, it’s worse. Collectively, we have super super restricted loved ones and those lying about their activity only to be outed by IG accounts/video. Head shaking stuff.
My wife, our son and I are on the same page. Thank god for that.
Hmm. We have mostly isolated. But we will do a bit of grocery shopping, grab some takeout, and we go for daily walks in our neighborhood where 6 or 10’ apart is easy. We mask indoors, we don’t mask outdoors, but we do carry our masks in case, if we’re on a busier outdoor trail. We’ve seen friends as we walk, and stood and talked for 5 min while apart. We had one couple over in our yard in May-ish. I’m getting super lonely. I’d like to do another yard picnic, distanced. But I’ve noticed my friends are pretty cautious mostly, and they aren’t ready. I’m trying to be patient, but also getting very impatient with the anti-maskers and covid deniers, because they are the reason we are in this never ending purgatory. I’ve starting jumping into neighborhood online chats to voice my frustration. I use to just be a silent bystander. Now I’m in the thick of it. Call it my mid life crisis.
Purgatory is the perfect word @Sasha. I feel the already fleeting PNW summer slipping away. I’d wanted to have our good friends over for a deck dinner, but their recently adopted 9 year old son plays with various other kids, so this alone makes me totally uneasy to follow through with those tentative plans. Think this is just going to have to be a year of deprivation in many ways…by any metric, I need and crave social contact Oh well, I’m stayin alive damnit!
And not to mention the empathy and despair I feel for others who’ve been impacted in shattering ways…
We’re Covid Very Careful in our behaviors as well. I have come to realize, though, that compared to us family members who believe they’re Careful are actually Covid Casual. To their way of thinking, these folks are being careful. But we would consider their behaviors to be only somewhat careful. As in: a permitted activity is not necessarily safe.
How awful that normal human interactions have turned into health decisions to be weighed, but that’s where things stand as long as the virus remains unchecked. Sigh.
Bingo. That is what I experienced with family members when I was Covid-stuck in Arizona. (A trip to Michael’s is essential? Really?) I mean, they are masking and social distancing and washing hands like crazy. But me, I am not going inside places (well, after that one day of air travel back East). Am I lonely and bored? You bet. But I am not sick and not a disease vector. (And so far they are not sick either thank goodness.)
Oh well, I’m stayin alive damnit!
