I suppose you could ask for the table to be set with S&P when you order your food so it’ll be there when you need it. The server might think you’re weird but that would be their problem.
Sure. But I don’t view salt and pepper any differently than I do utensils and a napkin–IMO they should be on the table, and not be available only upon request.
One can easily envision a Monty Pythonesque treatment…
“Excuse me, waiter, may I please have a chair?”
“I’m sorry, sir, we’ve had a few stolen, and Chef Trichinosis specializes in foods best eaten upright.”
“But that person has a chair…”
“Yes, sir. She brought hers with her. Not giving those away these days. Don’t see her whining over our policy.”
“Oh, I see. May my wife and I share a bench if we bring it in?”
“A bleacher? I’m afraid not, sir. We have standards, after all. Here’s your check.”
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I’m guilty of peppering things before tasting them. I rarely salt, unless it’s something like eggs or a baked potato, where I know there’s no salt on it, but I like the bite pepper gives to things like potatoes, meats, etc. Few places add enough pepper for my taste. But if I’m in a upscale restaurant with no S&P on the table, and the server doesn’t offer to grind fresh pepper on my meal, then it’s fine. I’m not going to start sneaking in my own pepper grinder! 
I heart this.
Everyone tastes everything differently, not just less sensitivity is involved, it’s hereditary and influenced by other factors as well.
I want folks to feel they’ve been well considered and their enjoyment is important to me when I cook for them, and I want to feel that way when I am served a meal. I rarely salt restaurant food, but I almost always want fresh ground pepper on something on my plate. I will ask for a mill if there’s ground dust in a shaker or no pepper on a restaurant table.
I don’t even get the point of cooking for others while suiting only yourself.
I put salt and perhaps pepper on the table for company – cutesie shakers for our usual very informal get-togethers, a salt cellar with little spoon for the kind with namecards and the good china. When it’s just us, or just us plus our usual Wednesday night guest, well, we all know where the salt jar is in the kitchen, don’t we? And the peppermill.
As for restaurants, I’m the guest there, it’s a business relationship, and if I want salt and there’s none on the table I’ll ask for it … and “the chef won’t allow it” is the wrong answer. The customer, as a boss of mine used to say repeatedly, may not always be right, but he IS always the customer. End of story.
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This thread is as good a place as any to note that one reason people might feel the need to season their food is to claim ownership of it. Maybe everyone knows this already, but if not, next time you dine in a group, watch as each plate is set down. Every diner will make a small adjustment, moving her plate slightly, or perhaps just touching the side of it. You’ll do it, too - it’s hard not to. I wonder whether salting could be - in some cases - another manifestation of that.
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Had not thought about the psychology of salting! I have know people with fairly eccentric tastes, or should I say behavior (?) when at the table. I can certainly see where, in one specific person’s life, there was a competition for attention and control at the family table. That seemed to manifest itself later as “I need a whole lemon for my salad”, I need more fresh ground pepper than anyone else and “where’s the heat” (ordering food outrageously hot or amending it to be so)? Nothing was ever satisfactory, as it was presented.
If so, I guess it beats peeing in a circle around the table.
I always taste first, rarely salt, so for me it’s not a factor. Sometimes I pour a pile of salt onto my food and I can see what a ridiculous amount it is and I cannot taste it. Most of the time, it’s salty enough.
Absolutely. This is a primitive response from low brain function. It says “Eat or die, and die trying to take my food!” Makes complete sense from the perspective of evolution.
The same responses are triggered whenever a “place is set” for someone. Done well, it’s a bridge to a safe place of conviviality, where defenses can be lowered and time passed pleasurably. This is the heart of hospitality.
Its ass is making the person uncomfortable in their place, through the myriad ways restauranteurs and their servers have connived, mostly stemming from an unnecessary assertion of control. Lack of S&P and insufficient tablespace are ones for me.
Aloha,
Kaleo
Or licking the stuff you want so that no one else takes it.
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I thought of this thread recently. I was out for dinner on a business trip, ordered a salad and attempted to get some pepper out of the cute mini acrylic pepper mill on the table. All form, no function, got a few tiny flakes but the thing seemed essentially useless. A nice thought to have spice mills on the table, but better when they function as intended. Luckily the salad was still perfectly edible without extra pepper and I survived
Yeah, but.
Whilst salt & pepper shouldnt be an issue, I remember reaidng all sorts of threads on Chowhound where customers had asked for this change, or that change. Frankly, there are some customers you can well do without.
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It’s quite common that we remove the top from those 
Having lived in Florida for a long time, all things are removed from the table when the snowbirds hit town. If you don’t they will steal them.
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They can leave off the no flavor black pepper and salt but I do want some good sea salt and freshly ground pepper if needed.
I automatically salt and pepper my food and I’m trying to get out of that bad habit…
I do love excessive spices and condiments…
The only changes I think a diner might be justified in asking for are the easy ones to fit dietary imperatives: asking for a salad minus the bacon, or a dish without the added meat. My vegetarian wife can usually find a good salad, or often nowadays a pasta dish, from which the meat can be omitted. But I do remember an occasion when someone in our party could not understand why his soup couldn’t be made with meatless broth, even after he was told that said soup had been simmering since early morning!
