The people who called you ethnic were showing their tolerance for you. That was sweet of them.
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Some people also self-identify as ethnic.
I have in the past. I sometimes do now. I feel ethnic, when I’m in a room and everyone around me has grandparents who were Scottish, English or Irish.
Most of my closest friends are hybrid ethnics like me. I suspect we are drawn to one another, being raised close to ethnic communities , with cousins overseas, with grandparents who did not speak English, or with ethnic foods at home, but not fitting completely within one ethnic community.
Now I feel so cuddly and warm inside.
Yes, everyone, including me, can self identify as ethnic since it’s true. I grew up Jewish by way of Long Island and Miami Beach. I went to Hebrew school and to this day I make a mean matzoh brei.
And yet, nobody has ever called me an ethnic…
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I’m an American. I was born in the US. I’m also of Chinese descent (in part). And I would venture to guess that at least 8 out of 10 people who don’t know me would describe me as the latter before they got around to calling me the former.
Everybody is somebody’s “other”. I think we have established that. The key is not to be a jerk about it. If you’re a jerk about it to me, I learn volumes about you, and will treat you accordingly. For example, when I hear somebody say, “I don’t see color,” I automatically think: “Liar. Not only are you lying to me, you’re lying to yourself.”
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I know some of my friends who are Jewish consider themselves ethnic here in southwestern Ontario.
Of course, whether one feels or identifies as ethnic is partly perception and is determined by how one fits into the community.
This may be why some people are more offended by the term than others.
It also occurs to me, that Canada has traditionally used a Cultural Mosaic approach to integration, as opposed to a Melting Pot approach.
My concept of ethnic might be seen through a Cultural Mosaic filter.
I, like everyone else, have an ethnicity. That is why it is silly to call out certain people as ethnic. It is not dependent on how anyone fits in.
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If one is made to feel feel like an outsider because of one’s ethnicity or one’s last name, it affects how one fits in. It affects one’s sense of belonging to a community.
Right now, polarization in Canada is the worst it has ever been.
The friend/ foe ethic asks the question are you one of us or are you one of them?
The friend / foe ethic could be about politics, or it could be about Mainstream (whatever that is) vs Ethnic (whatever that is).
Driving through va, here are two restaurants in the same strip mall leaning into their non-international identities 
I would have liked to have been a fly on the wall during the debate of “ax” vs “axe”
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As mentioned, everyone has an ethnicity or ethnic background in the U.S….and most every group was demonized or looked down upon arrival. The thing is, some groups integrate and assimilate more readily for various reasons. As I understand it, Swedes and Nordics were mocked for their accents but integrated quickly due to religious ,Anglo associations and yes appearance. Yet Italians and Portuguese were not considered “white” upon arrival, and certainly were not Anglo. There’s still marginalization in some urban areas…but the popularity of Italian cuisine bridged many perceptions. Yeah, food is a great ambassador because who doesn’t like to eat?
In any case, the common interpretation of “ethnic” today is non-white and non-European. Yup, the big boogie man here is RACE and what that brings…years of cultural attitudes, hate, discrimination and redlining of neighborhoods. This is the reality. Thus “ethnic” cuisine is often marginalized, considered “cheap”, i.e., see mom and pop Chinese joints and taco trucks for the easiest understanding. Many people are shocked went prices go up. Overhead like labor and rent are universal, so why give only ethnic places the down-market attitude?
This attitude of course transfers over to grocery stores. …but change is afoot. H Mart riding the Korean food wave are building new, gleaming stores and changing perceptions (hence the NYT article). Likewise, Mercado Gonzalez Northgate, in Costa Mesa, is a nicely designed, new from the ground up build. Neither are cheap or look cheap, per the stereotype of ethnic markets. Additionally, many “ethnic” markets are moving into abandoned mainstream supermarkets in “mainstream” shopping complexes, and these stores are nice, modern and large…what the American pubic has been taught to like. So change is here.
My take is simply call the market it’s given brand name, H Mart, Chavez Market, 99 Ranch. Most everyone in my area knows what it’s about and the core market…but there’s just about every ethnicity in there shopping. Using this method will change attitudes. Either people know or will ask and you can say H Mart is Korean but I got there for the seafood…and I can still get American junk food and “regular” staples like eggs, milk, etc.
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There are a couple of Uzbek restaurants in Marlboro; not the same, but as close as you’ll probably get.
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The perspectives on this thread demonstrate that many of us are more cosmopolitan in origin than others - many are also more have ethnic complexity in their family origins than those of us who are old stock “white bread” or highly assimilated north americans.
Its not a simple picture.
as i said before my concept of ethnic food encompasses euro as well as other cuisines if the store or restaurant is intended specifically to serve a clientele of that ethnicity . Its true that in a city like NY the actual clientele may be more diverse, but I still hold to the view that it is or should be able to be used as a , no judgment descriptive term.
I lived through the years where “ethnic” was often used in food talk as a shorthand for cheap eats/ foods of many lands, Sietsema-like, the weirder and more difficult to suss out the better. If i may say, there was a lot of food snobbery pro and con in those days with the star chasers and others preferring elite, almost always top european cuisines, (mostly French oriented with some italian (tho that was contested by P,otnicki and his ilk) maybe top tier japanese and a few chinese being exceptions) on one side and enthusiasts for less established (in this country) cuisines on the other. Happily many of us just liked great food and exploring and appreciating new and great tastes without taking a side, making value judgement beyond what tastes great, or least of all judging peoples and their cooking as superior or inferior . And the food scene and those cooking in it has gotten a lot more complex, with major chefs of many ethnic origins mashing up cuisines or presenting homeland cuisines at an elevated level recognized by the “elite” food establishment. This alone has rendered the idea of ethnic food as cheap or inferior obsolete as well as ignorant.
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This is a point I love exploring here on HO. I have tried a few times, some more successful than others, and on occasion I have been surprised about the sensitivity it sometimes engenders!
For the purposes of this go round, I am reminded of this place labeled DeKalb “farmers market” in Atlanta, Georgia.
The website refers to a “world market”. IIRC, I was there for “salt fish” and “pigeon peas”. Other folks from a variety of places were likely there for these and other things as well, and often called the same things by different names.
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To your face, anyway. I agree with those here who say it reflects more the attitude and perspective of the speaker than any intrinsic otherness of the object. 
I don’t think it’s very nice anymore as a standalone (“ethnic” v. “ethnic Hmong” etc).
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And that’s erasure, as well. Melting pot v. mixing bowl and all.
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This will be my last post because I’ve said it before:
I am considered “not other” and “not ethnic” because I have quite pale skin, have light green eyes that many people perceive as blue, and before my hair turned gray, it was considered “blond-ish”.
I look very generic northern European (not full Nordic blond hair and blue eyes) and in fact ancestors on all four sides of my family were English Protestants (some among the the first English protestants historically), and three sides of my family were in what is now called the US before the American Revolution, which makes them colonists.
I have insisted I am “ethnic” for decades because everyone has ethnicity.
When people who look like me and who are not Catholic or Muslim or Jewish or otherwise are also considered “ethnic,” by Americans or Western Europeans, I will be very happy.
I’ve really appreciated the posts about colonialism. It’s a complicated discussion. I grew up in NC and the race issue is a huge part of “ethnic”. I have lived in Boston for a few decades, a place historically where Italians and Irish and people from all parts of Asia and Africa and anyone not protestant christian were labeled as other and ethnic. And the race issue is everywhere.
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Hey- don’t dis my marshmallows… /s
LOL- I guess “normal” would pretty much be okay depending on where in the world one was.
I LOVE international grocery stores. I’m sure I’m considered a real dork by some of my friends for wanting to check them all out. We have several here, but there are more in Phoenix. I’ve actually traveled there to go international shopping, then I get carried away and buy too much and sometimes it goes bad because I can’t keep on top of all the merchandise I just had to have. I just realized that that DOES make me a dork.
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