It took me a while to reply, not sure if I’m actually answering anything for you or just rambling about my experiences, either way here are my thoughts for what they are worth.
It’s nothing like what you see in the movies, but then again what in life is? I learned this at an early age when I got my first pair of superman underoos, I added a cape but still couldn’t fly! There is a reason why most of the successful people in the industry truly have a passion for it.
To this day I credit my ability to multi task to the lessons taught to me from being a server and a line cook. Few people truly realize the mental organization it takes to be a good server. When I served we didn’t use food runners, you were responsible for all aspects of service, with the assistance of a bus person. It is imperative when you are in the kitchen getting table 2’s salads; you marry them on your tray with table 6 desert. Doing the most with the least amount of trips into and out of the kitchen leaves you on the floor where your tables can see you, and most importantly you can see your tables. To this day when I cook, I do all my prep at once then I proceed to cooking all my dishes together or simultaneously. I find it too tedious to concentrate on individual dishes rather than multitasking and doing everything together.
Regarding employees this really varies a bit from your moderate priced restaurants like TGIF – Ruby Tuesday – Olive Garden – Red Lobster – Joes Crab Shack etc. in these restaurants your serving staff are generally going to be transitional employees. Students, pat time Moms, part time people supplementing their income, people between full time day jobs. These are the most difficult people to manage, because they are only viewing the job as a short term fix for whatever they are going through in life. It’s hard to find people that are reliable and it’s hard to find people who truly care.
Once you get into finer dining, table cloth service there is an industry of professionals, people who for one reason or another have dedicated themselves to the hospitality industry and who treat their job as their profession. Easiest way to tell if someone is “industry”, when meeting or interviewing them is to ask them if they have a wine key. Perhaps not on their person, but almost certainly in their car. Hell, it’s been 5 years since I’ve had a hand in actively managing a restaurant, I still have wine keys in my center console. If they have their wine key, then I have them open a bottle of wine after those two things I have all I need to know if you are an industry server.
Another thing I learned early on and I have carried with me in any business I have managed, is to know every job of every person you manage. If you cannot relate the challenges subordinates face while performing their jobs, you cannot properly manage them. If your subordinates realize you “need” them, because you cannot perform their job, you cannot properly manage them. This is the only way to protect yourself from your kitchen staff from trying to exploit you. To be an efficient manager and leader you need to earn the respect of those you manage, there is a reason why regardless of your experience in life you cannot join the military at the rank of General. In order to be an effective owner or manager you have to have earned your stripes in the trenches, only then will you have the respect of your staff, only then will your staff dedicated to doing their best.
The hours are grueling and your life generally revolves around the people you work with because your hours are the opposite of 9-5. Remember you are there to provide hospitality to the masses when they aren’t working, so you are literally working the opposite of 95% of society. Most if not all of your social circles are either co-workers or other industry professionals. In most fine dining you are working long hours, grueling shifts, down time are surrounded by booze and generally there is a healthy supply of recreational drug(s) “around”. I have never worked in a restaurant that didn’t have their salacious love affair(s)………it’s all part of the business.
Personally I was born into the business so its second nature to me and while I have my own “day job” and career, the business will always be in my blood and I will always have close ties to it. It many ways it’s been my first true love. It’s certainly not for the faint of heart. Lol (that’s an understatement)